Tools for Emotional Health
Somehow we are nearing the end of August and what a summer it’s been for so many reasons. I think it’s safe to say that it’s been a time of increased awareness of emotions and anxiety since March; a global pandemic, heightened racial tensions, constant uncertainty, and the list goes on. How have you been doing? I’ve had good days and terrible days, moments of pure excitement and moments of absolute sadness, weeks that feel energizing and weeks that feel downright depleting. This is all human and normal, but this summer that was spring and is turning to fall feels very like a very different, jumbled time, and for good reason.
Yet, life still goes on; not only do we have all of these unprecedented times to wade through we also have birthdays, anniversaries, job changes, work projects, moves, vacations or staycations, date nights, and all of these more typical things that are happening in a less typical way or feel different because we are all at a different baseline. The past few weeks have been extra emotional for me as we help my dad prepare to sell the house my brother and I grew up in. After two weekend trips to Connecticut, each time I return home I feel. I feel a lot - all types of emotions, some fatigue, existential questions arising about where or what or who is home, and deep, deep gratitude for so much.
When I returned home from my first trip down, which was also my first trip out of state and out of this Upper Valley bubble I had been living in since March, I did my own rolling and movement practice, and I was hit with the weight of some of my past stories. There was an emotional weight that I had felt for the first time and it almost overwhelmed me. I have been carrying this story without owning it for the past 30 years and I had no idea; I was overcome with emotions and feelings some physical close to the surface and some deep in my core beyond touch. I was amazed that I had truly never felt these emotions before nor had I realized how heavy these emotions were. Three solid days of this intensity left me exhausted and in need of time to process, feel, and heal.
I share this experience because we all have these emotional moments and we are especially feeling them, or trying to numb them, now more than ever. Whether the emotion or story is fresh or old, we are all feeling beings. Yet even though we all have emotions, we have all grown up with a different relationship with them, some of us honor them and have been shown the power of releasing them, while others of us were not allowed to show certain emotions or were not even given the vocabulary around emotions. Whether you fall into one of those examples or somewhere in between, all of this changes our story and the experience we have.
The good news is, we are learning more and more about emotions from a scientific and research standpoint. And not only do we have access to these tools, we all likely have some more time on our hands to own these emotions and stories. These are the tools and mentors that have helped me work on my own emotional health. While this list is not complete by any means, it is what has helped me and may help you or start you down a feeling and healing path to owning your story.
BOOKS
Having the tools to rumble and show up from Brené Brown especially from her recent book, Dare to Lead, and her podcast, Unlocking Us.
Implementing RULER as described by Marc Brackett - listen to him on Unlocking Us and/or get his book, Permission to Feel.
MOVEMENT & STILLNESS
Embodying my body and being present with myself through yoga therapy, walking, meditation and resting.
Taking Yoga Tune Up classes online with Jill Miller and Yin Yoga and Yoga Nidra online with Octavia Raheem have been so healing the past few weeks.
REFLECTION
Processing and reflecting with talk therapy life coaching, journaling, and drawing.
Amber Rae’s new journal has been key for prompting questions in between my coaching and therapy sessions.
CONNECTION
Connecting with friends & family, even in this time of being socially distant it has been key for me to remain connected with friends and family to not feel alone as I go through this feeling and healing journey
Again, this list is not complete and may not be exactly right for you. I share my story and the tools that are helping me own my story as a way to step into my courage and possibly provide some courage for you to do the same. The greatest reminder for me is that this all takes time and can’t be forced, it must be felt and experienced. Here’s to feeling, healing, and owning our own stories so we can write the ending from this point on.